Update from the Art Room...letting go and trusting

I've been feverishly working away trying to get ready for the looming craft shows.  I wonder whether I will ever be as ready as I want to be?  I may have to accept that my own need to make perfection a goal when it comes to my own craft is a waning dream, and I'd be better off just shooting for above average and maybe surprise myself.

 (Hope or Lets Just Be...print by Jessica Gonacha...available here...not my work, 

but I adore it and it makes me happy.  I just had to share)

What I mean by this is that I have a picture in my head of how perfectly beautiful my booth will look.  I want it to be an experience for people, bursting full of handcrafted things with beauty and inspiration dripping from everything, color and texture so intense and yummy that the booths next to me look bland in comparison.  I want my displays to be gorgeous, professional, and look like I've been doing this for decades (and not 6 months).  I want to have so much inventory that I dont sell out too early, and have so many different kinds of products to sell that people have trouble picking what they want.

 (my heart is always home...by Harmony 2010...3"X3" Wood Panel mixed media painting covered in beeswax)

These are HUGE dreams, I know.  I tend to over achieve when it comes to this kind of thing and will always overspend on decor and display, because my vision of what I want it to look like somehow becomes as much if not more important than whether I end up making a profit when it's all over.  (Like right now I am in negotiation with myself on whether or not to buy a dress form to display the journal necklaces.  $70 just so I can put wings on the thing and create a story around my jewelry line).  I think I get so over the top with displaying my artwork because I am still not completely convinced that I am a "good enough" artist to sell my work, and maybe if I create a really special environment to display it in, I can convince people to take the time and find what is special about my art held within it.

 (Dream Flight...by Harmony 2010...top half of 18'X36" mixed media painting on canvas board)
Print available HERE

 I need to trust myself more.  Trust my friends and family here in Florida and you here using the internet, that I am good enough to show my work, to sell my work, and YES to even one day have a fan base!  Its a process, I know this.  Some days I feel more confident than others. After I finish a painting that I think is really good, I'll hit a high and be soaring with confidence and assurance that I should keep pursuing my passion as a profession.  But it takes no time at all before I am starting on a rough sketch on a new white canvas and feel that cloud take over my head and my heart sink a bit as I start to think, "there is no way I can pull this off well.  I might as well not try."

 (Loved Birds...by Harmony 2010...Mixed Media assemblage piece on 4"X4" Wood Panel)

So that is where I am at... learning to let go and to accept and love myself for who I am and where I am at in my artistic journey.  These pics are a few of my HIGH moments this week, and I wanted to share them with you.  Thanks for all the support you have given me.  It is part of what keeps me going.  I would love to connect with other fledgling artists like myself.  If you have an artsy blog that you keep up with pictures and stories from your own creative path, please share the links in the comments.  I promise to visit often and return the support.

Be Blessed My Friends :)

 



 

Fear, loathing, and painting faces

Today I was thinking about Trust and Fear. Specifically how they relate to me as an artist and the risks that I do and do NOT take in my art.  This thought pattern came from my ecourse I am taking from Kelly Rae.  It is challenging me to rethink my process, open up old wounds, confront my weaknesses head on, and challenge my comfort zone.  So I am terrified to try to paint people again.  I havnt done so since 1993, when I left art school for the "real world." I keep myself from doing people because I know that I will have to face the reality that I am not as good as I used to be.  That perhaps my art is (gasp!) bad.  I cant keep doing this though.  If I am really to move forward I have to put myself out there and take a risk and make (gasp!) bad art, to allow room for the good art to peek through and, hopefully, take over.

So I did this painting...

Its just a start.  The girl needs a lot of work, esp in the face, and I am not sure exactly where I was going with it, but it will come to me along the way I suppose.  I wanted to try using alcohol on the paints to make them run, and went a bit overboard.  I really like how the flowers turned out, but the girl... not so much.  I'll try again and show you what I end up with.


Then I wanted to do something really free.  So I employed my 2 year old son Israel, a budding artist i tell you.

He LOVES painting with momma, so we got all set up and did some collage/painting (which involves me squirting paint onto the cardboard in color palettes that I like, him having a party with the paintbrush on it, while I slap down collage pieces in between his brush strokes.
Once they are all dry and done, I'll post pics of them.