A bit of catch up...

My world has been overwhelmed with good things lately.  Mothering, art making, new friendships, all good stuff, but I have been lacking in my posts here.  I am truly an introvert in that way.  When my life gets really busy, I tend to shut out any other social outlets that I can, just to keep myself feeling on top of it all.
So to catch up a bit, here's a few pics of my Easter Boys.

 Always the happiest baby in town, my sweet Zay celebrated his first Easter Day with all the Joy that the Lord has given.  He is such a gift to me, I often wonder what I did to deserve such sweetness.

 My oldest, Izzy, was not interested in a regular easter egg hunt, so my sister ingeniously incorporated his favorite game into the mix and viola! He was so excited to help the Angry Birds recover their stolen eggs that the pigs hid around his Grandmother's yard.

And then there was lots of train time with Grandpa...

I always forget to take pictures of myself and my husband.  I suppose all the cuteness just distracts me, but we had a wonderful weekend of friends and family gatherings.  I couldnt have imagined a better way to celebrate resurrection day!

So in my life right now, I have two art shows coming up in the next month, which has put me and my sister back together working again to get the booth, artwork, displays, all together and ready.   I am making some shifts and trying to do more ART shows and less CRAFT shows.  The crafting part of getting ready for a festival is like and addiction but the work load sucks the life out of me, so I am trying to quit.  I am on step 2 of the craft making recovery process.  It might be a long road ahead to a full healing, even now I've had two different moments this week of "I could totally make that and sell at my shows!", and then I have to stop myself and remember my promise to myself and my boys that I am done with mass crafting (no matter how stinking cute and easy it looks on pinterest!).   So I have reinvented my booth to feature mostly just art and prints and invested in a professional wall system.  Here's a booth shot with a quick mock set up I did the other day for a show application.

(of course I realize after the shot and everything was put away that the paintings in the back were crooked).
I  honestly wish that I could just make art and somehow it would find its way to the people who want it, without all this presentation and show, but I am trying to pay my dues to the process of becoming a selling artist, and I am very blessed to have my family supporting me in this and my sister's dedication as a teammate to helping me get there.  I have been working really hard on some new pieces.  I havn't been able to get them scanned yet, so I'll post them as soon as I can.  In the mean time, I did a few more digital artworks using layers of my own hand-illustration and vintage photos that I own.

 The Dancer  2012 by Harmony Lenasbunt

I Vow Forever 2012 by Harmony Lenasbunt

You can find prints of both of them in my shop.  I hope you are having a wonderful April.  I will be on the road with my family next weekend doing my first OUT OF STATE show.  YIKES! I am a bit nervous, but it should be lots of fun.  If any of you are around the Chattanooga area, come on out and see us at the Chatty Crafty.  Well, there's a little boy yelling my name, so I'll sign off.  Be blessed and check back for new painting updates and pics from our next show.  Ciao Bellas!

XO, HARMONY

Motherhood...(sigh)...

I love most everything about being a mom.  My two kiddos make me laugh and keep a smile on my face almost all day long.  Then we have our off days, the fussy, impatient, needy, clingy, crying, off days.  That was today, and I am mentally and physically exhausted.  So a little photoshop therapy in the form of what I am calling digital art journaling, and I feel much better.  I've been playing with layering vintage photos and different textures and colors.  Its really fun when you want to be creative but you dont have the time (or the space) to get messy just then.  So with a baby bouncing on my knee and a 3 year old building structures on the floor behind me, I made this.  Hope it inspires you too, and I wish you (and myself) a stress-free day tomorrow.

XO, HARMONY

Look What I'm Playing with...Knitters Loom!

Oh how I adore funky chunky art yarns.  I've been spinning art yarn for a few years and have been wanting to find ways to showcase them as art instead of knitting them into a functional piece.  So you can imagine my elation at receiving a gorgeous knitters loom at Christmas.  I've been eyeing this thing for awhile and I am super excited that it's finally in my home.  I got a chance to start playing with it this week, and it's everything I hoped it would be.  It's super easy to warp, super easy to use, and totally compact so I can hide it behind the table when I am not using it (saving my work from curious sticky fingers).  It's made to handle the larger diameters of yarn, so I can finally use all my funky stuff and make wall art out of them.  Here's a few pics of me warping the loom and getting ready to start.

 A Mischievous Yarn Thief.  He was creating "scenes" with his Disney Cars characters and apparently my yarn ball made the perfect addition to the story.  I wish I could see into his imagination sometimes. It seems so magical.

I cant wait to create something out of this skein!  I'll post pics as soon as its done.  What was your favorite artsy Christmas gift this year? 

XO, HARMONY

Birth

"birth" Mixed Media Painting by Harmony Lenasbunt 2011

I created this painting about two months ago, while waiting for my second child's Birth Day.  It's a strange space to be in, waiting for your life to completely change.  Not able to move forward in my own time or power, but constantly reminded that in a moments notice you are going to be hurled into transition (both emotionally and physically).  It becomes a practice of letting go, allowing yourself to become powerless to the natural flow of life, giving control over to God.

The painting says, "Waiting for you, my miracle, my child, I will never find a greater joy than discovering life through your eyes."

I had been promising to share my birth story of Baby Nazareth with you for a while now.  I know that this isnt a baby blog, but my children have immensely influenced my artistic process and infected me with tons of inspiration and creative energy.  Being a  Mom is what, I believe, made me a better artist.  It certainly gave me the courage to come out of the creative closet, so to speak, and start putting my art out in the world for others to see and enjoy.  My second birth was such an empowering experience and has really motivated me to "birth" a new direction for my art and creative process.  So it seems fitting to share this story with you here.  I actually wrote this up once already, but in all the chaos of life with 2 kids I got distracted and my computer's battery died before I remembered to save the document.  So in the bit of time I have this afternoon, (3 year old son at the park with his dad, and baby boy snoozing away in his bouncer at my feet) I will attempt to share with you the experience I was given for the birth of my second child.

2am-ish: I woke up randomly.  I laid there in the dark for a few moments lamenting for the millionth time the woes of being pregnant and not being able to sleep properly.  Just then, I felt a tingly rush of energy travel down my belly.  I stood up to go to the bathroom and felt wetness running into my pajama bottoms.  I was instantly wide awake.  "This is it.  Today is your Birth Day." I sent thoughts to my little babe and then prayed for peace for both me and the babe that day.

I tried to go back to sleep, having gone to bed only 2 hours prior, but to no avail.  As I lay there in the dark, I felt the beginnings of labor rushes starting up, dull and low, but definitely regular every 4-5 minutes or so.

I woke up my husband  and he called our midwife.  The same midwife who helped me through my first home delivery, and I was so happy to have her back with me in this life event again.  We told her not to come yet, but wanted her to know that she would probably have a short night of sleep.

3am-ish:  My contractions are still 3-4-5 minutes apart, some closer together then longer stretches, giving me lots of time to recover and rest.  The pain is easily bearable, and I am so tired at this point, just from lack of sleep, that I spend the minutes in between lying on the couch trying to zone out and rest as much as possible.  Then by 3:30a, I start to feel the real stuff,  the dreaded back labor that paralyzed me in my first birth, it was starting to build, and I had prayed against my fear of the pain, and prepared myself for what I knew would be a very strenuous and emotional process.  With each tightening in my belly, I felt the pain wrap around my middle and then explode in my lower back and travel up my spine.  Lower back counter pressure and ice packs helped some, but finally I knew I needed more relief.  I told my husband to call the midwife back and have her come set up the birth tub.   This was one of my plans to help alleviate the back labor if it happened with this birth.  (We assumed she would come set it up and then go back home for a few hours to sleep.)

3:30am-ish:  My midwife arrived and we decided to do a check to see if I had made any progress (mind you I had been checked a few days before and there was no dilation with a very posterior cervix (meaning, not much had happened).   We were all surprised to find that I was already a stretchy 6cm.   She also found that my water bag had definitely broken but it broke high up, and therefore still had quite a bit of water left in it.  She broke it lower so that the baby's head could engage the cervix better (he was tilted back a bit).  She then called my second midwife and told her to start coming our way in the next hour.

4:30am-ish:  My contractions are still only 3-4 minutes apart, but at this point the pain in my back is so intense that it actually isnt subsiding with the release in my belly.  Kneeling in the hot shower was helping quite a bit, but I knew that we needed all the hot water we could spare for the birth tub, and once I got out the back pain returned twice as intense and almost crippling once again.  My second midwife arrives at this point and offers to do the sterile water shots we had discussed the week before.  I had heard of this technique as a way to naturally reduce back labor without medication and was ecstatic that my midwives were familiar and willing to do it for me should I need it.  They injected saline into my back in four pressure points during a contraction, and within 5 seconds the back pain was GONE! Praise the Lord!  I would HIGHLY recommend this technique to anyone experiencing back labor who wants a natural no-medication birth.  With the spinal pressure no longer an issue, my belly contractions felt totally manageable and almost too easy to focus through.  The tub was ready at this point and I was able to slip into warm comfort and labor away with my husband at my side.

6am-ish:  I felt like my contractions were slowing a bit in the water and thought I should get some gravity help to speed things along.  As much as I didnt want things to get harder, I was really motivated to have as efficient a labor process as I could manage.  I got out of the water, and we did an internal check to see what was happening.  This is when we found that there was still a small bulge of water bag in front of the baby's head which was keeping him from applying full pressure to my cervix.  She opened up that part and allowed the head to fully descend. 

We continue to labor in the living room, leaning against the couch for rest in between and then getting on hands and knees to focus and vocalize through the contractions.  It was a sweet time, quiet and dark, calm music playing and just my husband, my two midwives, and myself working together as a team.  By the grace of God, my three year old son was sleeping peacefully in our bedroom, totally unaware that anything was going on in the house.  In the moments of calm, we would chat easily about all sorts of things as if we were just having a friendly gathering, and then when I felt the wave of energy building up and a contraction start its way down my body, I would bend down and start my focusing routine while one of my helpers rubbed down my back and legs helping me to stay relaxed.  When it was over, they greeted me with words of encouragement, and I continued to feel positive, strong, and in control the entire time. 

Still at this point my contractions were not so overwhelming, not at all like I remembered in my first birth experience, and only about 3-4 minutes apart, with an occasional 1-2 minute apart phase.  I was convinced that it was going to take quite a few more hours before the "real" laboring and transition process started.  I felt perfectly fine in between the rushes and even when in a contraction, I never felt that I couldn't handle it.  This was a HUGE difference from my first labor where the back labor was completely unexpected and totally threw me off, and I frequently lost my confidence and my focus to get through the pains.  I was hurting so badly that first time, that I had begun to hallucinate and think REALLY crazy thoughts, like that I could just stop being pregnant and that I changed my mind about wanting to have a baby.  I got through it though, with a beautifully successful natural home birth, but in the end I felt emotionally traumatized by the physical pain I endured.  Back labor is truly a beast and I was totally unprepared for it in my first birth.  This time I had a plan in case it happened and it was working beautifully.  The water injections had given me the relief that I needed to stay present and calm as my body did what it needed in bringing my son to me. 

7am-ish: I felt the back pain start to build back up again with every rush.  "Ok, there you are ridiculous insane pain.  I had forgotten about you."  The water injections usually block pain for 3-4 hours, and they were definitely starting to wear off.  I began to feel less strong and more frantic in the height of the contractions as my back labor pains surged.  (its a lot like sciatic pain, only times a billion and it shoots right up from the tail bone up your back).  We decided to do another round of the saline shots so I could finish my laboring process feeling strong.  I will not pretend like the injections arent painful.  It was actually the only time (except at the end of the pushing stage, that I actually cried out).  It feels like 4 really bad bee stings happening when you are already hurting, but within seconds the pain is gone (other than some soreness on the actual skin where the needle went in), and then the back labor just melts away.  At this point, I start to feel some pressure during my contractions, and I know that my baby is almost here.

8:00am-ish: The pressure is really starting to build, and we decide to get me back into the birth tub.  I still didnt feel like I was close to the transition stage yet, that dreaded phase where contractions are right on top of each other as you body finishes opening and the baby starts to descend.  My contractions were still only 2-3 minutes apart, and I felt a little silly getting in the tub to start pushing, when I was sure that it would take much longer.  My midwife asked me to put a finger inside to feel where the baby was, and there was his head just over a knuckle deep.  I was blown away.  What an amazing experience! I was almost done and still had never found a point where I felt out of control or that I couldnt do it.

In the tub I start to push lightly with each contraction.  The pressure starts to get more and more intense, and I change positions to get better leverage.  The contractions slow to every 4-5 or so minutes, giving me lots of time to rest in between, and the room is silent as we all wait for the next pushing contraction.   I pray quietly for grace and for strength, as I am feeling that "I've been awake for almost 24 hours" jittery weakness that you get when you've had very little sleep.  I push for about 20 minutes or so (my timeline is a bit fuzzy so all these times are estimations).   Then with a lion-like roar and one great big push, I feel his head move through the burning of my skin stretching and then come out of my body (literally the weirdest feeling ever).   We pause to check for any cord wrapping on his neck and then one final push and he's out in the water.  My midwife helps bring him up to me, and I see his sweet little face for the first time as I wrap my arms around him.  Only 6 hours of labor!  I couldn't believe how much I instantly loved him.  This time I wasnt meeting my little one at the same time as I was discovering myself as a mother.  This was totally different.  I've been a mother for almost 4 years now and really found a true identity for myself within that role.  So this time, saying hello to my little one, I could just love on him and confidently care for him without all the bumps and bruises of the learning process to becoming a parent.

I am so blessed to say that I experienced no postpartum depression symptoms, not even so much as an hour or two of the baby blues.  Within a few hours, I felt normal, exhausted, but normal, and was back at my regular routine within a few days.  I really attribute the ease in which I was able to birth my son, and the incredibly quick recovery I experienced to several things... first, having the birth experience that made me the most comfortable and was the most supportive to my needs (not having constant back labor, Yay!), second, being able to exercise all the way up until my delivery day, and third, having lots of amazing support from friends and family with meals, occupying my three year old, to taking over with the baby when I needed extra sleep, I even had helpers keeping my house clean and laundry going for the first couple weeks!  What a blessing it all was, and it allowed me to just sit back and relax and get to know my new little man.
 
I encourage anyone having a baby to make sure you have all those three things in place for yourself, and anyone who knows someone about to have a baby to see how you can help them have one of those things.   Anyway, that's my story.  Thanks for listening.

It's now been 7 weeks since that night, and I am really motivated to pick back up on this creative journey I've been on.  I really want my boys to learn by my example that creating a life around those things that you are passionate about is a better life than any other you could have.  I am passionate about my family and my art, and so I will always surround myself with those things no matter what.  What are you passionate about?  Do you let it be a focal point in your daily living?

XO, HARMONY

Living Slowly, Loving Fully.

We've been up to our eyeballs in babyland over here.  It never ceases to amaze me how much time, attention, and energy caring for a tiny human can take.  Over the past 3 weeks, our little family has really pulled inward and just immersed ourselves in getting to know and falling in love with our newest member.  Baby Zay has been unusually easy on us all (compared to his big brother's newborn lifestyle), but most especially on his mama (me!).  He only took a few nights to get his nights and days on track, and wakes to eat every 2-3 hours but then happily goes back to sleep.

Big Brother Izzy is amazing! Not a hint of jealousy and he has been so sweet and helpful with the baby.  We did deal with some jaundice with Zay for the first week and had to get the bili-light blanket to help.  We called him our little glow-worm, and he is doing just fine now.

I've been incredibly blessed to have lots of help these first few weeks, with loved ones staying with us to help with early morning wake ups, so I can go back to bed and get a few more hours of sleep.  I am actually averaging 6-7 hours each night, which is a miracle with a new baby.  We have a lovely new routine of playtime, snack time, and nap time, with trying to keep the house in order as well as entertain my 3 year old in between.  Balancing two kiddos is different, and I realized how much I got used to the independence my older son has.  There is very little time for mommy to do anything not parenting-related right now.

I do miss my craft room.  I really miss my painting time but know that there will be space for that in my life very soon once again.  I did, however, finish reading a leisure book for the first time in like forever, did all my Christmas shopping (thank God for the internet), and caught up on all the episodes of Mad Men that is being streamed on Netflix.  (all of these things done while rocking/nursing/ burping/ etc). 

So right now, I am taking it slowly. Breathing in the sweet moments. Knowing so fully well how fast they will go by.  I am hoping to post my birth story soon.  I had it almost all typed up and then got distracted by a projectile vomit situation and then my computer died (before I remembered to save it, bummer.)  So I am going to have to give it another go again soon when I can find the time and focus.

I am excited about starting up with the 2 e-courses I signed up for to get my creative momentum back up after Christmas and am really looking forward to diving back into art and creative time to myself soon.  There are SO many amazing artsy courses being offered online this spring.  It was really hard to choose, but I chose this one and this one, because they were so perfectly aligned with where I want to be artistically and creatively right now.    What creative courses are you taking, or are wanting to take this year?

XO, HARMONY

He's Here! Please Meet Baby Zay.

Just a quick check in...trying to type with one hand... we had a beautiful Birth Day.  Nazareth Blue was born @ 8:49am after 6 hours of labor on 11/17/2011.  We had a wonderful home birth and he was born in the birthing tub, just like I wanted.  It was a truly beautiful and sweet experience.   Will tell more about it later, until then we are getting lots of rest and tons of snuggles in.  

XO, HARMONY

I'm Still Here, Just Waiting....

"Simple Joys" 2011 by Harmony Lenasbunt (Prints available HERE)

I know the blog has been a bit silent the last 2 weeks.  I had lots of intention to keep blogging daily with creative goodness and updates from my shop and life and all but once the craft show was over felt really confronted with the decision to focus on my family life without the distractions of my creative work.  I chose my family (my husband and 3 year old son), mentally closed the door of my art room, and we've been preparing for the arrival of our new little one together ever since.   First there was the practical stuff... cleaning and organizing the house.  Holy Cow, how did I let it get so messy and dirty this year?  Between graduate school, my art stuff, and family life, the house work fell to the side.  We kept things relatively clean and straight, but did so by stuffing every closet full of randomness and ignoring all the dirt and dust that was gathering in the corners and cracks of our home.  So a full home overhaul was desperately needed and with the help of friends and family, we got everything decluttered and cleaned.  We gathered all the supplies we need for our impending birth (have a second home birth planned!), and started creating our birth plan for labor, what to do with my eldest son, who will be doing what and when, etc...  We went on the mother of all grocery trips, stocking up for the next few weeks to make life more simple as we tackle the ups and downs of newborn care taking and labor recovery.  And then we played together just the 3 of us as much as we could, celebrating our last days as a threesome and getting excited to add one more to the silliness.  We went on lots of nature walks, visited a local farm, attended an art festival, built sheet forts, made gingerbread cookies, and had nightly snuggle times of storybooks and songs.   All the while, I can feel my body starting to prepare, getting ready to bring this new life into the world.  My normal labor process tends to take several weeks of on and off mild contractions, and we are definitely getting very close to the end of that preparation period.  I am currently 5 days away from my "due date", but all that really means is baby could come at any point between now and 2 weeks from now.  The waiting is the hardest part, next to the sleeping (so hard to sleep now).  Trying not to get psyched out by all the starting and stopping my body is doing, but also trying to stay ready, positive, and strong for the "real thing" when it does begin.  So I just wanted to let you know that I have decided to let this blog slow down for a bit while I focus on my family, on the coming birth of my second son, and on myself.  I will be updating here as things happen, but it will be in the timing that works best for my family life and not on a regular schedule.   Thank you all for sticking with me and granting me patience in this very special time. 

My shop is still open and is a way that we support our family income, so if you are starting to think about the Christmas season, keep me in mind.  I am still working on adding all the new artwork and journals I created this Fall there, and there are several new ones up this week, so take a look and see what I've been up to.   Be blessed friends and have a very lovely week!

XO, HARMONY

From My Art Journal: 3 weeks and Waiting

I thought I'd try something different with my Art Journaling for a bit.  I usually work in sketch books, because I can get one with heavy enough paper to handle all the abuse I do to it, but I came across a really lovely old book at the library sale last weekend, and felt inspired to try some altered book work with my journal pages.  I've never really done altered book and am excited to try something new.  The book is called "Art Stories" (seriously, that is what it is called), written in 1935, and has the sweetest illustrations and children's stories about art.

It was meant to be.  I wasnt really sure when I would start working on it, since I had so much going on in my home life and a million things to list on etsy for the holiday season before I had this baby, and so tucked it away on a shelf, but then I came across this post about self promotion as an artist yesterday and it REALLY hit home for me.  Did any of you see it yet?  I found the message really powerful, and realized that the pressure to keep promoting my art was taking more time and space in my life than actually creating it (which is what I really love).  So this morning I waded my way through my art room (which is currently a storage space for all my bins from the last art show), pulled out my paints, oil pastels, and alcohol inks, and started playing.  The theme ended up being about my official arrival at 37 weeks pregnant today, giving me about 3 more weeks to wait until this lovely little boy arrives.  Here's a quick tummy shot.  Yes, I am wearing a zebra print tank and PJ pants with a sport bra.  I am down to only 2 pairs of pants that fit and maybe 4 shirts, and sport bras are all I can stand to wear underneath right now, so fashion is not exactly a top priority. 

I am still feeling good, doing regular activities and exercise, I just get really tired very fast.  I am also getting a little impatient.  I have never really been very good at transition.  I just want to get the changes in my life over with and start the new chapter.  I hate waiting for a major change that is almost here but not quite yet.  It's like you have no idea what to do.  I want to focus on my last few days of just the 3 of us as a family, but then don't want to be too detached from preparing for the impending birth and labor process about to happen to me.  I also have a TON of work still to get the house ready for baby boy's arrival, but no energy to do it like I want to right now.  So instead I Art Journal and purge out all the nervous energy and unsure feelings.  It really helps.  I dont actually get anything else done, but I feel better.  Here is my first spread completed in the book. 

I had to glue several pages together to give the surface enough sturdiness to work on with paint and inks, but that is kind of standard practice when working in altered books.  Isnt the original illustration on the right adorable?!  I couldnt stand to paint over it.   

Any of you tried this medium before for journaling?  I'd love to hear about what you liked, disliked about it.  What worked well and see any pics if you got them.  In fact, I am currently looking for anyone who wants to do a guest post about art journaling, (share some of your pages and tell the stories about their content or how you created them).  Just send me an email and we'll chat! feedyoursoulart@gmail.com  Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

XO, HARMONY

From My Art Journal: Playfulness and Acceptance

It's time to share a few more pages from my art journal.  The first two were my own, the second two are a collaboration between my 3 year old son and I.  I really love having him be a part of the creative play that I do each day.  He keeps me on my toes, and teaches me to let go of expectation and vision (which can often be stifling boundaries in the creative process.  Hope you enjoy them today!

 If there are any other art journalers out there, feel free to share any links to pages that you've posted lately.  I'd love to see them and learn a bit more about you.

There is still time to enter my sponsor giveaway this week! 8 incredible prizes for one winner! Click Here to Enter. 

XO, HARMONY

Baby Love: The 8 Month Update

Ok here it is.... time for a baby update :)  I am no longer able to ignore it.  I have reached the point where I am constantly aware that I am pregnant.  Everything I do takes more effort, more time, more focus.  I can no longer multitask, as I can barely remember all the details of one task let alone the several I used to easily balance.  My feet are gone, hidden under this belly of mine, and the inner kicks and turns that were so sweet a few months ago are now annoying and painful.  Even my "maternity" clothes are feeling tight and less comfortable, and I can no longer be bothered to get dressed out of my PJs unless I really really have to.  Sleeping is hard, hard to breathe, hard to stay comfortable, hard to stop thinking about all the things that still need to be done.  Oh and I am hot and sweating all the time...and all of this is dwarfed by the fact that I have a very active three year old constantly by my side.

I had sort of forgotten what the last 2 months can be like, or maybe I blocked it out.  I am not a very good pregnant girl.  I dont enjoy the extra attention, and I really just get more irritated by the physical limitations of my state than excited about all the extra food and naps I get to have.  I know there are women out there that really love the experience of being pregnant.  I am just not one of them.

At least I only have 8 more weeks of this.  8 more weeks until we meet this new little guy.  I am really excited to meet him, to hold him, introduce him to his big brother and awesome dad, and to find out if God has finally blessed me with one of those "great sleepers" I hear so much about from other moms.  We literally just pulled out the bins of baby stuff last night that we packed away from our first son and are finally sorting through clothes and toys and assessing what we still need to get.  I was starting to panic for a bit there when I realized I was more prepared for my craft show in October than I was for the birth of my second son happening just 3 weeks after that.  So I am slowly making progress on both fronts, realizing that I wont be as prepared for either as I want to be, or even as prepared as I had been before.  Just for funsies, here's me 3.5 years ago with 2 months left to go... overly prepared and anxiously waiting our first son's arrival.

 Of course, at that time I thought I was huge and completely exhausted and totally not prepared.   Little did I know that I'd get bigger the second time around, I would now kill for the level of exhaustion I was dealing with then, and I had everything I needed in that moment to be a good mother.  I have everything I need to be a good second time mom now too.  For I know that even if we dont have everything we want/need in place when he arrives, this little boy will be very very loved and that is the most perfect beginning to life I can give him.  We can scramble for the rest of it as we need to.  So, I am not letting the stress of a too busy life wear me down, as I look forward to all the squishy sweet moments like this so soon to come...

And I welcome all the chaos, exhaustion, distraction, and oodles of fun that two of these little guys will bring my life...

XO, HARMONY

From My Art Journal: Embracing the Good with the Bad

I sat down last night with the intention of creating a few pages in my art journal trying out some new stamps I had carved.  It was supposed to be both intentional, since I needed to create a few new designs for my materials, and also therapeutic for me to zone out, as my day had been hectic and exhausting and now my husband needed to go out for a few hours leaving me in charge of night time routine with our 3 year old (an hour long battle every time, that I was willing to put off and avoid for at least another 30 minutes).  So I thought I would take a bit of time while my son was occupied with his trains in the other room and have some creative play time just for mommy.  So I thought...  About ten minutes into it he shows up and insists that the paintbrush is his and that he should be painting.  "Ok."  I shift my work space to make room for him next to me, give him his own papers to work on and go back to my own work.  This however, would not do for him.  He was apparently feeling more like collaborative work with mommy, and continued to take over my paper and execute his vision.  No matter how many times I started over, he would not let me finish a page without his heavy handed paint job on top.  (and let me add taking frequent breaks to jump on me and tickle me and pull at my clothes).  As cute as this was, I found myself getting frustrated and a little touch sensitive.  "I've been with you all day doing activities and playing, cant mommy have a bit of time before showers!" was all I kept thinking.  It was at this point that the now very strong and active little guy in my uterus decided to join the fun and began kicking away at my already uncomfortable belly.  I kind of just wanted to run away and hide.  But then I just took a deep breath and let go.  I let the "bad" art happen all over my pages and then joined him, tossing to the wind any thought of what was good in terms of color palette, form, texture, design.  We just painted and it looked awful, but it was fun.  In that moment, I learned that my life isnt going to slow down and isnt going to be less crazy anytime soon, so if I dont figure out how to embrace those chaotic moments and just be a part of it, it will end up swallowing me whole.  So here's to an insane lifestyle of motherhood and building an art business.  You'll pardon me while I go take a nap.

Thanks for listening to my struggle today.  I hope you enjoyed our "bad" art journal pages.  (FYI: I really dont think that there is anything in the creative process that is "bad" Some of it is just more frustrating to get out and get through than others).  Create some "bad"art in your journal today and see what you can learn from it. 

XO, HARMONY

Inside My Art Journal: New pages from a mama's world

I am going to be honest here.  Sometimes art journaling is about having fund with art with no pressure, and sometimes it really and truly is a healing process for my own emotional funk that day.  I've been having one of those pregnancy hormone surge weeks where everything seems to overwhelm me and everything seems to make me cry.  It's a normal thing, and having been through it once before, I know that it will pass soon.  So instead of crying in my palette over a wrong brush stroke or a color choice misstep, I put away the expensive paints and canvases and pulled out my art journal and $2 craft paints.  I played, I sketched, I doodled, I went over images several times.  I wrote words to myself, and to my son (who has also been having a cranky week this week).  I experimented with new techniques and materials I've been wanting to try.  In the end, I got no closer to checking anything off my "To-Do for Craft Shows" List, but I feel a lot better.  Thank Heavens for Art Making!  It is my favorite therapy.  Here's a few of my pages from my week.

There you have it.  A peek into my head this week.  I am definitely enjoying working messier and playing with brighter colors.  Both of those things make me feel authentic when I work, instead of my previous process of working and reworking and obsessing over "perfection."  I think I may be growing creatively :)  Feel free to share links to your art journal pages, or if you dont art journal but want to start, dont wait any longer!  Pick up a regular ol sketchbook with heavier pages, or stop by my Etsy Shop and take a peek at the creativity journals I make for art journaling, stock up on cheap supplies you can play with (sharpies, pencils, cheap paint, collage scraps, stamps, pens, markers, anything goes!), and start creating.  There are no rules!  Let the process free you from whatever worries and stresses you are carrying with you.  Time to play :)  (and that is my soapbox).  Have a wonderful and creative Wednesday!

XO, HARMONY

A Morning Photo Session: New Artwork!

Remember my morning run and impromptu garden photo session a few weeks back?  Well, I have turned some of those pics into art! I was really inspired by this artist and her incredible art yarn paintings, and thought I could do something similar with hand stitching.  I printed the photos onto fabric and mounted them into my newly purchased oh-so-amazing vintage metal hoops, and just plodded along one stitch at a time.  They took me a lot longer to complete than I had thought they would.  Everything on them is done by hand, no pattern, just me slowly painting along with a needle and thread, creating a truly organic pattern that celebrates and tributes the beauty and art that can be found our natural world.  I finished them last night, and so my son and I staged a bit of a photo session with them this morning so I could share a special first look at them with you. 

They measure 4", 5", and 7" and have vintage hand dyed silk ribbon to hang them from.  They are one of a kind original mixed media fiber art, and I couldn't be more proud of them.  I will be listing these on Etsy later this week, so if you are interested in any of them and want them reserved for you, please message me. 

So if you are wondering what happens behind the scenes when trying to photograph art while taking care of a small child, then here's a bit of the other side to our morning.

Here's me on the front porch, because its the only place in my horribly lit Florida home that gets decent light in the morning, and yes I am still in my PJs.  I'll be honest though, I spend most of my days now working at home in my PJs.  What's the point of getting dressed when all my pregnant self wants to wear is baggy shirts and stretchy pants anyway?  I can still just barely see my toes, Yay! - I did have to lean forward a bit though :)

Baby boy was on the hunt for more flowers for me to photograph.  We have very little as far as flowering plants in our yard right now (who has time to garden?) but he did very excitedly produce this lovely purple wild flower discovered under a bush.  He loves to bring me flowers, roots and all.

Then he decided that he needed to paint the cardboard that I was using as a background for my hoop shots, and drug out some white paint and a brush that he swiped from my craft room while I was busy shooting.  Here he is showing me how he painted my flower and made it pretty.  He also apparently made the walkway pretty as well...(somebody should be watching this child more closely).

So there you have it, my latest creations and a bit of our morning.  I have quite a few more of these hoops in the works that I am saving for Fall Craft Show season, but I just couldn't resist sharing these first few with you.  Have a lovely Tuesday everyone! I am off to hose down an exuberant young painter and a walkway. 

XO, HARMONY