Why is it so hard to get back into a good routine after the Christmas Holiday break? Its been over 2 weeks since I last posted, and I find I am struggling to get "back to the norm." As I speak its 12pm, my son and I are still in our PJs enjoying a lunch of leftover popcorn from one of those Christmas tins that they sell for $5 around the holidays. I spent the last weekend doing nothing but watching reruns of a fashion design reality show, (something about watching the creative process of other art mediums, gives me new ideas for my own artwork), and I just cant seem to get myself out of the vacation mindset or even close to thinking about starting a new art project. Part of the problem is this:
Yes, this is my creative space. Its a fantastic mix of the aftermath of 3 months of shows, Christmas gift making, and storing all the extra random stuff I acquired from my show displays that will no longer fit in our overstuffed garage. Its a holy wreck and it is wreaking a bit of a havoc in my head space for creating. So before I can take anything thing new on, I have to clear out the old and get it organized.... (what a cliche way to start the new year) - :)
Here is a bit of something I started working on before the Christmas break and just cant seem to get momentum on now to finish it. Its like everything I try to do on it just feels muddled and without clear intention. I am hoping if I make myself clean my work space that my heart space for imagination and creativity will clear out as well.
I will also admit to you a bit of my own personal process constantly going on in background of my thoughts throughout all of this. I chose to finish my Counseling Degree this year, (previous post about that
HERE) and my mother's over thinking, guilt, and needless worrying has kicked in the last few days. It took me hours to fall asleep last night, as I went over my new schedule AWAY from home and AWAY from my son over and over in my head. I want nothing more than to stay home with him and finish my last clinical when he (and any other subsequent children) are older and busy with their own school schedule, but unfortunately, the world doesn't work like that, and I have to choose between finishing now or not finishing at all. As I am writing this out, I am realizing how much borderline anxiety I've been holding onto about this upcoming transition for my son and myself, and this is probably contributing to my feelings of overwhelm and confusion when it comes to starting a new art project.
So I am giving myself permission to slow down, take one step at a time, first clean my work space, let my heart start to clear of my worry and calm my nerves, and ease into giving time and attention to other sides of my life that I may not be so excited about... and in the mean time, there will be lots and lots of attack hugs and silliness.
