Wednesday, September 14, 2011

From My Art Journal: Embracing the Good with the Bad

I sat down last night with the intention of creating a few pages in my art journal trying out some new stamps I had carved.  It was supposed to be both intentional, since I needed to create a few new designs for my materials, and also therapeutic for me to zone out, as my day had been hectic and exhausting and now my husband needed to go out for a few hours leaving me in charge of night time routine with our 3 year old (an hour long battle every time, that I was willing to put off and avoid for at least another 30 minutes).  So I thought I would take a bit of time while my son was occupied with his trains in the other room and have some creative play time just for mommy.  So I thought...  About ten minutes into it he shows up and insists that the paintbrush is his and that he should be painting.  "Ok."  I shift my work space to make room for him next to me, give him his own papers to work on and go back to my own work.  This however, would not do for him.  He was apparently feeling more like collaborative work with mommy, and continued to take over my paper and execute his vision.  No matter how many times I started over, he would not let me finish a page without his heavy handed paint job on top.  (and let me add taking frequent breaks to jump on me and tickle me and pull at my clothes).  As cute as this was, I found myself getting frustrated and a little touch sensitive.  "I've been with you all day doing activities and playing, cant mommy have a bit of time before showers!" was all I kept thinking.  It was at this point that the now very strong and active little guy in my uterus decided to join the fun and began kicking away at my already uncomfortable belly.  I kind of just wanted to run away and hide.  But then I just took a deep breath and let go.  I let the "bad" art happen all over my pages and then joined him, tossing to the wind any thought of what was good in terms of color palette, form, texture, design.  We just painted and it looked awful, but it was fun.  In that moment, I learned that my life isnt going to slow down and isnt going to be less crazy anytime soon, so if I dont figure out how to embrace those chaotic moments and just be a part of it, it will end up swallowing me whole.  So here's to an insane lifestyle of motherhood and building an art business.  You'll pardon me while I go take a nap.
Thanks for listening to my struggle today.  I hope you enjoyed our "bad" art journal pages.  (FYI: I really dont think that there is anything in the creative process that is "bad" Some of it is just more frustrating to get out and get through than others).  Create some "bad"art in your journal today and see what you can learn from it. 


  1. all i can say is OMG!!! this is awesome. i sent you a message..... :-D

  2. All I can say is try to love it all Harmony, the good, the bad, the hectic, the frenzied, the brief moments of calm....the years go by soooo girls are now 14 and 18 and sometimes it really does seem like a these pages you both created ♥

  3. This is a beautiful post - really touching and profound in the lesson you learnt. Great stuff!

  4. Yes, motherhood has it's amazing challenges, but you grew up another 1000% when you just played with your son. Apparently, he needed you. You filled his need. Now he has learned that, once again, he is important. He will take this with him into life and find stability instead of feeling less than wonderful about who he is. At some point in the very near future, he will be off by himself exploring, and you will miss him. That's another lesson for another day.
    Feel good about all of it. Your art is always amazing.


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